Posts Tagged ‘ Cut! ’

Rules of the Game (Girl Version): Day 10

February 8, 2011
By
Rules of the Game (Girl Version): Day 10

Mission 1: It’s Opposite Day Today, we’re practicing the art of ‘disqualifying’ someone. The reading is called, “The Power of No.” Some main points: In every interaction, be the person giving validation, not the one needing it. Screening Screening exercise: Imagine ideal man. List qualities like personality, looks, upbringing, values, interests, knowledge, and life...
Read more »

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Culture, The Game | No Comments »

[Cut!] Not Any Old Tramp Stamp…

July 2, 2010
By
[Cut!] Not Any Old Tramp Stamp…

When asked about your favorite band, you lift up the back of your shirt to reveal your huge Aerosmith tattoo?  Dream On, Sucker.  Cut!
Read more »

Tags: , ,
Posted in Cut! | 5 Comments »

[Cut] None of Our Business

May 4, 2010
By

Loud talking so that everybody knows your story?  Cut. This one’s usually on a train or a plane, or somewhere where you are stuck with these assholes who grab their voice like a rubber ball, and hurl it about the cabin, allowing to bounce violently off every available surface, spilling people’s drinks, hitting them...
Read more »

Tags:
Posted in Cut! | 1 Comment »

[Cut] Nicholas Sparks

April 28, 2010
By
[Cut] Nicholas Sparks

You're about as much of an artist as a monkey that accidentally shits in the shape of a heart.
Read more »

Tags: ,
Posted in Cut! | 3 Comments »

[Cut] Facebook Plans Announcer

April 27, 2010
By

Updating your status because its Friday night and the gang’s coming over for canasta?  Cut. I’m assuming this is done because the person in question thinks the general response to “Fifty cent Jello shot’s at O’Leary’s” is for all of her Facebook friends to nod pensively and say, out loud to no one, “My,...
Read more »

Tags:
Posted in Cut! | 1 Comment »

[Cut] Whistling from a truck

April 23, 2010
By
[Cut] Whistling from a truck

Oh, man. I can't wait to have sex again some day.
Read more »

Tags: , , ,
Posted in Cut! | No Comments »

[Cut] Ankle Tattoos

April 20, 2010
By

Going to the tattoo parlor and coming back with a butterfly on your ankle?  Cut. “I’ve always wanted a tattoo,” you say.  ”I think it would be so cool, like Chad Kroeger.” You know this barely counts.  It’s one thing to coat your arms with snakes and demons and metaphors for band names.  If...
Read more »

Tags:
Posted in Cut! | 2 Comments »

[Cut] Denial Smoker

April 9, 2010
By

Popping out for a cig for the fifth time while reassuring everyone you don’t smoke?  Cut. Look, smoke if you want, no one’s going to judge you for that.  Well, yeah, a lot of people actually will.  But at least go through with it.  Don’t tell us you’ve never paid for a pack and...
Read more »

Tags:
Posted in Cut! | 1 Comment »

[Cut] Cold Fluids

March 30, 2010
By
[Cut] Cold Fluids

Pancake syrup in the refrigerator?  Yeah.  Cut. Its syrup!  Why would want it cold?  Now its thicker, slower, and harder to distribute on breakfast.  It can’t go bad. Also, it’s morning–I’m lucky if I get out of the kitchen without setting my pants on fire.  I don’t have time to watch as the syrup...
Read more »

Tags:
Posted in Cut! | 1 Comment »

[Cut] Takeout Rage

March 24, 2010
By

Slight issue with the delivery order, to the point where you’re quaking with tearful rage?  Cut. Easy, there.  I realize they forgot the hot sauce.  That doesn’t require you to break the arm rest off the couch.  Buy a stress ball… or a cat… but for god’s sake, leave the furniture alone.  It’s just...
Read more »

Tags:
Posted in Cut! | No Comments »