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From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Shushing

December 6, 2010
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From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Shushing

This is the fourth and final major duty of a substitute teacher. I remember the first time I got a lesson plan like this: “Complete page 834, 38-50, 51, 52, 54, 61. No Talking. If anyone is uncooperative, leave their name. When I return it is an automatic detention. NO QUESTIONS ASKED.” Sounds like...
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Posted in Culture, Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | No Comments »

The Mustache Diaries: Day 8

October 12, 2010
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The Mustache Diaries: Day 8

The Earth doesn't revolve around the sun, but rather the Universe revolves around humans. Literally. Cause we named that bitch.
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Posted in Culture, Dress, Lit, School, Science | 2 Comments »

The Mustache Diaries: Days 6 and 7

October 10, 2010
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The Mustache Diaries: Days 6 and 7

Growing a mustache is much like the start of new a day. It is something to measure progress with, advancement, or simply the passage of time. Of course things aren't always so simple. But it is interesting to watch your own visage change daily.
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Posted in Culture, Dress, Food, School, Science | No Comments »

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year: School Supply Season!

September 7, 2010
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It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year: School Supply Season!

For me, September marks the beginning of the most wonderful time of the year – school supply shopping season.
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Posted in School | 3 Comments »

From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Quotations. (What would Mr. Christ do?)

July 7, 2010
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From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Quotations.  (What would Mr. Christ do?)

It’s an ordinary Tuesday in the second week of June, and that means the kids aren’t doing shit.  And it means I – the sub – am not doing much to change that. It’s the first time all year it’s not pitch black during 1st hour.  Instead of being at the mercy of a...
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Posted in Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | 3 Comments »

From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Freedom Watchers

May 21, 2010
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From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Freedom Watchers

Let us revisit the four essential duties of a professional substitute teacher: 1) Put your name on the board. 2) Take attendance. 3) Hand out the worksheet or push play on the VCR 4) Shushing Today we will be focusing on the second part of duty #3. “Hey Mr. Killstudent,” a friend of mine...
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Posted in Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | 7 Comments »

From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Worksheets

April 1, 2010
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From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Worksheets

Let us revisit the four essential duties of a professional substitute teacher: 1) Put your name on the board. 2) Take attendance. 3) Hand out the worksheet or push play on the VCR 4) Shushing Today we will be focusing on duty #3. “We got a su-u-u-u-b!“  A freshman boy deliriously spreads the good...
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Posted in Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | 5 Comments »

A Horribly Bitter Description of Film School from Someone Who’s Been There

March 5, 2010
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A Horribly Bitter Description of Film School from Someone Who’s Been There

“Battleship Potemkin… is that the one where Steven Seagal is the Navy SEAL disguised as a cook?”
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Posted in Art, Film, School | 1 Comment »

Notes from the Unemployed

September 27, 2009
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College is a complete waste of time, designed for idiots who have been trained how to think. Recently, I was denied a teaching job because of something shocking on my resume. As a result, the only option left to me is continue playing in a band, because my career as an academician has come...
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Posted in Career Services, School | 4 Comments »

I'm open to suggestions

June 22, 2009
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One of my sophomore roommates in college said that I’m “open to suggestions,” which is something that has stuck with me because the truth of it was undeniable. In college, it was true because I would prioritize doing something fun over schoolwork (who didn’t), even though I worked enough that I didn’t have a...
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Posted in Culture, School | 1 Comment »