All Posts in Lethal Teaching Tricks

From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Shushing

December 6, 2010
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From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Shushing

This is the fourth and final major duty of a substitute teacher. I remember the first time I got a lesson plan like this: “Complete page 834, 38-50, 51, 52, 54, 61. No Talking. If anyone is uncooperative, leave their name. When I return it is an automatic detention. NO QUESTIONS ASKED.” Sounds like...
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Posted in Culture, Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | No Comments »

From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Quotations. (What would Mr. Christ do?)

July 7, 2010
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From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Quotations.  (What would Mr. Christ do?)

It’s an ordinary Tuesday in the second week of June, and that means the kids aren’t doing shit.  And it means I – the sub – am not doing much to change that. It’s the first time all year it’s not pitch black during 1st hour.  Instead of being at the mercy of a...
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Posted in Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | 3 Comments »

From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Freedom Watchers

May 21, 2010
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From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Freedom Watchers

Let us revisit the four essential duties of a professional substitute teacher: 1) Put your name on the board. 2) Take attendance. 3) Hand out the worksheet or push play on the VCR 4) Shushing Today we will be focusing on the second part of duty #3. “Hey Mr. Killstudent,” a friend of mine...
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Posted in Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | 7 Comments »

From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Worksheets

April 1, 2010
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From Mr. Killstudent’s Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: Worksheets

Let us revisit the four essential duties of a professional substitute teacher: 1) Put your name on the board. 2) Take attendance. 3) Hand out the worksheet or push play on the VCR 4) Shushing Today we will be focusing on duty #3. “We got a su-u-u-u-b!“  A freshman boy deliriously spreads the good...
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Posted in Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | 5 Comments »

From Mr. Killstudent's Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: How to Take Attendance

June 9, 2009
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From Mr. Killstudent's Lethal Bag of Teaching Tricks: How to Take Attendance

Attendance is the most important duty of any substitute teacher.  At first, it was also the dullest.  Imagine if you were the opening act of a comedy show, and had to begin by reading names, one by one, in the phone book.  In class, by the time you hit the B’s, bored students begin...
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Posted in Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | 15 Comments »

I Understand You. (Your Permanent Horoscope).

May 13, 2009
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I Understand You. (Your Permanent Horoscope).

For Birthdays Jan 1 – Dec 31: **** There is the “you” that everyone around you knows, and most of them like the person they see.  However, in addition to this side of you, there is another side of you that almost no one sees, that you keep to yourself or to only a...
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Posted in Lethal Teaching Tricks, School | 9 Comments »

Lethal Teaching Tricks: Mr. Killstudent, Substitute Teacher

May 6, 2009
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Lethal Teaching Tricks: Mr. Killstudent, Substitute Teacher

The self-titled debut.  And just like our finest rappers, I have decided to use my first release to introduce myself.  I would have written it earlier, but I’ve been all Brian Wilson kinds of obsessive about it.  I’d have an idea, sit down to type, then get distracted and end up wasting the rest...
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Posted in Intros, Lethal Teaching Tricks | 10 Comments »