All Posts in Cut!

Slight issue with the delivery order, to the point where you’re quaking with tearful rage?  Cut. Easy, there.  I realize they forgot the hot sauce.  That doesn’t require you to break the arm rest off the couch.  Buy a stress ball… or a cat… but for god’s sake, leave the furniture alone.  It’s just...
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Girl cares so much about a dog that she says it will always be the most important thing in her life? Cut! I can tell you from personal experience that it sucks being with someone who cares more about the dog(s) than you. The one saving grace about the girl already having the dog...
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His Facebook profile lists Enya, Insane Clown Posse, and Creed as his favorite music.  Cut. –
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Order a salad on the first date? Cut! I like food. You should, too. It tastes good and provides all the nutrients you need to maintain a healthy body weight. Sarah Jessica Parker is NOT a healthy body weight.
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Sends (sober!) texts like, “Hey cutie. Your so sexy.  We still on for tonight? Can’t wait to see you their.”  Cut. – In this spirit of Dealbreakers, here’s a column where nonpretentious contributors tell you when to cut your man or your woman.
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Girls with dead-eyed rat-dogs in sweaters sticking out of their purses?  Cut. That thing is begging to be anything else: stuck in a drainage pipe, fighting off a vigorously thorough parasite, 20 seconds from becoming hot dog meat.  Just do it a favor and chuck it into traffic like a baseball, sadist.
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Short woman cares about you being tall? Cut. I’ve seen this online so often….”must be over 5 ft. 10 inches.” Talk about superficial. It’s one thing if you’re a tall woman, but I’ve seen this on so many short women’s profiles.
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Guys under 5’5″?  Cut. – In this spirit of Dealbreakers, here’s a column where nonpretentious contributors tell you when to cut your man or your woman.
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