nonpretentious

Hard Choices: Shower Curtain or Glass Door

Throughout life, people have to make a variety of tough decisions.

• Grad school or 9-5?
• Children or pets?
• Shower curtain or glass door?

Think about it.

Choosing between a shower curtain and a glass door isn’t as easy as it seems. Sure, there are functional benefits to a glass door – water doesn’t leak as much, the floor doesn’t get wet, and you can write your name on the wall when the doors steam up. But….how can someone just say no to a cute shower curtain with rubber duckys on it? It’s quite impossible. But, I guess that’s the challenge we face each day – function or beauty? Writing your name in steam or duckys.

Then I got to thinking – why can’t we invent a glass door that has a shower curtain?!

That way you are guarded from bathroom dwellers…unless you’re showering with them.

You get to write notes…that disappear after a few moments.

And, you can accessorize with cute animals!

It’s time for function to meet beauty head on.  Nothing could be better.

Pennsylvania Dairy Fight

I live in Wisconsin.

Wouldn’t you expect the string cheese to be so good here? Well it’s not. It’s nothing compared to polly-o orange and white twist-ums. (This is where I would insert a picture for all of you who don’t know what polly-o twist-ums are…but I just looked on google and all of the pictures are very small so it would be a waste of my time and yours).

Anyway, the reason I am bringing up this dairy post is because of this funny event that happened 2 nights ago….

I am in a film and TV class and every thursday we have a screening from 6-8 pm. This week we watched All in the Family, Kate and Allie, and The Mary Tyler Moore show. So since these are television shows they obviously had commercials (duh). Well, one of the commercials during The Mary Tyler Moore Show was the “happy cows come from California” commercial. You know what I’m talking about? Here.

Well, anyway, you would have thought I was at a sporting event after that commercial played. Everyone was booing, screaming, fighting, throwing things. It was bad. Then the show came back and everyone was normal again.

I guess the point of this post is that…people from Wisconsin are always like “we’re the country’s dairyland” (that’s what their license plates say) But like….their dairy isn’t really THAT good. So, Pennsyvlanians, I know most of you are, we need to hype up OUR dairy! Why do California and Wisconsin get all the credit when pollly-o string-ums are SO good and are not sold anywhere in the midwest or west coast? AND, how come i can’t find any smart food (white CHEDDAR – still dairy talk – popcorn) at any grocery store here? I’m very angry.

So….lets make buttons! posters! flyers! PENNSYLVANIA DIARY IS BETTER THAN WISCONSIN DAIRY.

you hear that, Lonnie?

left left left right left

i feel bad for the leftys out there.

seriously. all the lecture halls at this school discriminate against leftys! (i really don’t know if that’s how it’s spelled because the red squiggly is telling me it’s wrong…….)
anyway, are you a lefty? how did you deal with the unjust desks??!?!!

i’m a righty.

i’d like to welcome you all to…

crinkly leaf season.

cause what’s better than stepping on a perfectly dry leaf and having it crinkle under your foot? ahhh. i think that’s better than an orgasm. no, seriously. if i had to choose between reproducing and crinkly leaf season i’d probably go with the latter. wait? sorry. that might offend people….

OKAY I SAID. i’d rather have crinkly leaf season than have a child.

i would sell my soul to the devil for an endless crinkly leaf season.

DO YOU LOVE it as much as i do?

shut up and let me vent

i’m actually in the worst mood ever.

i thought i’d write a post so you can all understand how incredibly horrible my day has been. (shit, it’s only 2:30). anyways, it started out like any normal day – wake up, put my contacts in, do a little dance to a little diddy on the radio. but THEN, there was no more special K with strawberries in the cabinet, the apple juice was watery, and the gushers were all gone!!!!!! (to those who have read my previous post you understand why this is very tragic). Anyway, I suddenly realized that i wasn’t 5 and decided to not make a scene about the lack o’ food in my humble abode. Soooo…off to class i went. First class – nutritional science. Enough said. Second class – italian. exam. HARD!!!!!!! third class – well i’m waiting to go to my third class now so i’ll tell you how it goes. Anyway, i know most of you are old and grey and college graduates. (that sucks, by the way) luckily, i still get to live the glory days of college. HOW COME NO ONE TOLD ME IT WAS SO HARD??? i’m mad at all of you. ESPECIALLY YOU!!!!!!!!

Okay, i’m not. who i’m really mad at is Lonnie. He tied me up and forced me to get him double stuffed oreos. seriously, Lonnie, calm yourself. Anyway, before i go to my lovely class on greek mythology…i want you all to know that i was NOT satisfied with your help regarding the iliad. i still don’t understand it.

embarrassing screen name talk.

what was your first screen name?

i hope it was something along the lines of:

“anfbeachbumxoxo14″ or “tennistar4″ or “doggyluva33.”

If you are traditional and just had a “Initials/Birthday/Year” then don’t even bother posting because you need to reevaluate your personality and creative side.

inspiration: KTB506 (kimbo the bimbo + address)

help me.

living in a sorority house is fun. especially when you have a full-time chef who stocks the
fridge and cabinets with an endless supply of food that makes you think “shit, i’m definitely
not making bikini season this year.”

anyway, i was just hanging out in the kitchen, searching through the cabinets and what
do i find? gushers!!!! do you remember those things? i didn’t. and i’m younger than
everyone who posts on here, so you all don’t either. so don’t even lie and say that you do
because that would just piss me off.

anyway, next to the gushers were…FRUIT ROLL UPS! like, c’mon. blast from my 5th grade
past right there. i was a bringer. my mom never packed fruit roll ups because they were too sugary so i traded at the lunch table for them. anyways, what i’m trying to say is that
gushers and fruit roll ups are now the staple of my diet. AND, after my nutritional science
lecture on friday afternoon, i learned that that is NOT okay. so…..should i keep eating
the gushers and fruit roll ups OR should i listen to Professor Nutri Sci. Help me!!!!!!!

-Tough love.

oh, also, i’m reading the iliad for school right now and i just don’t get it.
help me with that too.

no creative juice.

you haven’t received enough tough love in a couple of days so I decided that I would post.

Unfortunately, the creative juices aren’t flowing so I am unable to entertain you with my inspiring words.

Instead, I was just wondering …if you were stranded on a desert island and could only bring one type of dorritos, which would it be? The red kind or the blue kind.

Think about your answer carefully because I will judge you.

pet peeve.

has anyone figured out why you cannot repeat the farting noise your shoe makes when you are trying to prove that you did not fart. anyone?