To shave or not to shave?

August 20, 2008
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once, i was lucky enough to chit-chat with an unnamed person in my life while she took a poo in my parents’ bathroom. we were talking, badmouthing a certain ex-boyfriend of mine, and suddenly she wiped. honestly…it looked like there was a fur coat living in her vagina.
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Letters to Inspiring Writers: The Snark is My Favorite Legal Writer

August 20, 2008
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Letters to Inspiring Writers:  The Snark is My Favorite Legal Writer

Dear The Snark: Hi, how are you doing today? I know you only have six (6) minutes to read this letter so i will try to be short. Your column cracks me up. Though i am not a cog myself in the BigLaw machine, I am in the business of “trading cogs.” In short,...
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Letters to Inspiring Writers: Thanks for Making This a Softer World

August 20, 2008
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Letters to Inspiring Writers: Thanks for Making This a Softer World

Status: Message successfully sent To: untoward@asofterworld.com, thisisfurious@asofterworld.com Subject: a fan’s plea hi joey & emily: i’ve been a linker to your site for a long, long while. i’d call myself a reader of your site but i can’t promise that i read it everyday. just sometimes. but over a number of years. like, if...
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Mr.Oink’s Zero Entry

August 19, 2008
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What is a Mr.Oink? I am. And what indeed. I’m only the newest product from NonPretentious. I am (and I took a personality test on Facebook to figure this out, so listen up) — I am Creative, Expressive, Logical, Objective, Curious, Compulsive, Spontaneous, Loyal, Ambitious. The personality test also said that I was organized....
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Say Goodbye..

August 19, 2008
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too suddenly, too soon, too much. R.I.P. Leroi Moore
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Let me shit on your chest.

August 19, 2008
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Please. Its not like I discriminiate on the basis of age, gender, or cognitive ability. If you have a chest, I want to shit all over it. No? You’re still not getting it! Let me break it down:
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Dog Dies During Routine Traffic Stop

August 19, 2008
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I saw this story on Good Morning America yesterday morning, and I found it a bit controversial. Dog dies during routine traffic stop. Now here are my thoughts.
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hi.

August 18, 2008
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for sake of my college GPA, i have to be mjs’ slave for nonpretentious and common vision. i don’t feel like writing a paragraph to introduce myself so I will just say that I am the best looking! I also *love* taking credit for everything mjs does!!!
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damn, i want Penelope Cruz

August 18, 2008
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damn, i want Penelope Cruz

there is nothing like being 26 years old and going to the movies with your parents. on a Saturday night. when it’s still light out. this is especially true, if the movie features a scene with P. Cruz & Scar-Jo making out.
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“Like something between a dog howling and a baby crying”

August 13, 2008
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“Like something between a dog howling and a baby crying”

There was a story in the news a few days ago about a man being violently stabbed and decapitated aboard a greyhound bus by a fellow passenger. A witness described the victim’s screams as being “like something between a dog howling and a baby crying”, (unecessarily) adding that “I don’t think it will leave...
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