“The Recession Got Me Laid”

April 13, 2009
By

Just moments ago, I was chatting with my friend from New York on the internet. He said he met a girl last night. Being the  awkward, shy, computer programmer (who recently got laid off) that he is, I asked him how he pulled it off….

“if you’re up front with girls and tell them you’re unemployed and a loser, they just think you’re funny and confident”

I agreed.

This chick is probably excited about knowing the “unemployment rate”, and could totally be like “omg that’s crazy, i’ve been hearing a lot about losers and unemployment these days” This creates a common ground for conversation, which in return gets you laid.

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4 Responses to “ “The Recession Got Me Laid” ”

  1. stereocache on April 13, 2009 at 1:10 am

    hrmm. i’ve been totally honest and told girls i “have no future prospects” but i don’t get those results.

  2. musicsnob79 on April 13, 2009 at 8:35 am

    Yeah, right.
    If I have a job and the dude doesn’t, it’s a no go, and I always have a job. I don’t need to live off him, but I’m a chick and, yes, I work for a living. I don’t need someone else trying to live off me!

  3. IanCaithness on April 15, 2009 at 7:42 am

    I too am sceptic as to the actual logic beneath this argument. It proposes numerous different facts about women, in general.

    1. It assumes that all women watch the news and understand the impact of a global economic downturn.
    2. It assumes all women have jobs.
    3. It assumes these women are idiots.

    All of those points are incorrect.

    1. The media is creating a hyper-reality which some people do not agree with; capitalist media creation is a huge problem here.
    2. Not all women have jobs. Some still find the principle of a ‘house-wife’ as a good prospect.
    3. I’m quite sure that most women do not respond to a chat-up line ‘I’m unemployed and I’m a loser’ with the response ‘omg that’s crazy.’

    I do not accept that unemployment is a means to a relationship and, although isolated incidents may work, I am sceptical.

  4. HOTWZ on April 19, 2009 at 8:43 pm

    WHY SAY THIS? IF YOU ARE TRUE NOT PRETENIOUS AND NOT PRENTENTIOUS LIK SOME OF THOSE I KNOW, YOU WOULD JUST SAY

    “HELLO, I LIK YOUR IMPUTER!”
    “OH YA?”
    “NOT RLY, I’M NEGGIN CUZ I AM NONPRETENIOUS”
    “LOL”

    FUCK NO ONE SAYS LOL IN PUBIC FOR REAL. CEPT THE GIRLS AND BOYS I DATE!

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